Winner of – Best Family Blog – from VUE Weekly 2017

The Undad


I’ve been assured by friends and family that one can swear on a daddy blog. It was really my only stipulation for starting one.1

I’ll be starting my paternity leave this week. That is 33 weeks of raising a little human. I’m looking forward to it. Just like you look forward to horror movies. I’m not being facetious.2

Being a writer by trade this seems an easy3 transition. I’ve been a writer for close to 20 years, the last few spent as a journalist and editor. Also, my wife wants me to keep creatively busy and doesn’t want me losing my mind. Whatever part of it I haven’t already lost. She constantly jokes that I was dropped on my head as a child but I’m pretty sure that during a recent visit with my parents my mother took her aside and said, “Oh we dropped him as a child, a lot. Dropped the crap out of him. Right on that part of the head that protects the smart part of the brain.” My wife denies this ever took place.4

Truth be told, I never wanted to be a father. Not really. That was up until I met my wife, Elizabeth. Then things just got all natural n’ shit. She opened up my eyes to a world of love, compassion and other types of silly crap.5

I’m not sure what will come of this. My little hoser, a three-month-old boy, is a wonder. Being adopted, I’ve never had this type of connection. I’m sure I’ll get into that later.

I called this site The Undad for several reasons. One, Dad or Alive was already taken. Dadwood just sounded a bit too pervy (well, just the right amount of pervy). And, Colour me Dad was just too fucking stupid. Plus I do like horror movies. And canoes. And reality. So, The Undad, a man who never really wanted to become a dad, but is totally elbow deep into it now (and thoroughly loving it) is a nod to the dead becoming the living but still being a bit of a weirdo. What?

There, first post done. Now I’m going to go do a whole bunch of cocaine, and by cocaine, I mean laundry.6



Editor’s notes:

1 Trent has also been reassured by his wife, me, Elizabeth, that he can say anything – anything – he wants on this 33 week journey.  I’m going to live to regret that. It may have been in a drunken stupor that I agreed to such a thing. I mean sleep deprived state oblivious to any sense of reality. Oh, you’re right, that correction was redundant. Drunken stupor – Sleep deprivation – same same.  Trent has asked me to review his posts and add to them as I please, this will be something he will likely regret.

2 This means nothing to me Trent. Taking care of Valdy is the most wonderful, amazing, terrific, exhausting, heartbreakingly satisfying thing I have ever done. Horror movies are the thing I’ve tried my hardest to avoid throughout my life.  After a few bad experiences with Encounters of a Third Kind, Psycho, and Leprechaun 1 through 3 at slumber parties, I cannot imagine anything more horrid than looking forward to a horror movie.

3 Trent has clarified to me that the easy transition was to writing a blog. Initially I read this as the transition to stay at home dad, and I laughed a caustically evil laugh that radiated throughout out our tiny home, and caused a minor energy disruption on the Richter magnitude scale.

4 She didn’t use the word crap Trent.

5 I love you too.

6 Thank you for folding the mountain of clean laundry I left on the bed throughout the day.  Please note.  Doing the laundry involves putting the dirty clothes into the washer, adding soap and turning the washing machine on.  After some time has elapsed doing laundry then involves moving some of the laundry to the dryer, turning it on, and hanging up the remaining wet laundry in a careful fashion.  Folding already washed laundry would probably refer to folding laundry.

1 Response »

  1. Funny! Good writing! The Grammar Nazi in me is impressed. (This is my nickname; I am, ironically, also Jewish … hmmm)
    @Elizabeth: Your husband is right! You are terrific! Thanks for letting me into your world through this blog! 🙂

Leave a Reply


RSS The UnDad Podcast

  • Never use it as an excuse
    Mr. Owen Brierley is a delight to talk to. Join us as we chat about what it is like growing up being legally deaf, what a lawnmower parent is, and how everyone should have their own personal version of 'It's All Gone Pete Tong'. This episode is powered by ATB and sponsored by the Alberta […]
  • I have a ghost in my head and I call it Garglemax
    I got an implant that connects to a wizard class synthetic user interface. It's like 'Alexa' that only I can hear. It's for science. Everything is fine.
  • Who would win in a fight, Mr. Rogers or Jesus?
    Scott C. Bourgeois and I talk about our respective adoptions, what part of your body you should eat first if you were trapped on an island, all the effing podcasts he is involved with, and the best of kid lit.
  • Jana O'Connor PT 2
    The second of two parts of our Jana O'Connor interview (please listen to the first one if you already haven't). To get to the point: Jana is a jewel in the crown of the Canadian arts scene. She is triple H (not the goddamn wrestler): humble, humorous, and ensconced with humanity. We talk about working […]
  • Jana O'Connor PT 1
    As the Etruscans put it, this one was a doozy. Join me and Jana O'Connor as we cover everything from antiquated idioms to how to butt in line at the dentist (and everything in between). We talked so long that I had to cut it in two. I had to cut it in two because […]
  • I think the Jedi have it all wrong
    There is some rampant nerdery as Darren Pleavin and I talk horror movies, horror feelings, invisible motorcycles, family horror, and some scary stuff that left us holding each other, cerebrally. This episode is powered by ATB and sponsored by the Alberta Podcast Network. Thank you to Andrew Paul and the Edmonton Community Foundation for the […]
  • His Dumbledore is Shit
    Garglemax handles the heavy lifting while I talk shop with Dave Breakenridge, the Managing Editor of the Edmonton Journal, Edmonton Sun, and Edmonton Examiner. Topics covered: Helicopter parents, swearing, ADHD, Harry Potter readings in character, the 10/3 Podcast, columnists as journalists, and where not to get a tattoo.
  • I'm still doing comedy
    Ken Valgardson answers the phone for a content over audio quality interview. We chat comedy, teaching, parenting, and child bowels. It truly is a magical time to be alive. Powered by ATB and the Alberta Podcast Network with help from the Edmonton Community Foundation.
  • We're heroes
    A rousing conversation with Elena Porter where we talk about being an actor and parent, the great Arlington Apartment fire of 2005, murder, and buying a horse. Powered by ATB and sponsored by the Alberta Podcast Network.
  • Porch Fire
    Laughter, a short Western novella, and Elizabeth does her best to tell the future while translating 'baby'.

Follow The Undad via Email

Enter your email address to follow The Undad and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 39 other subscribers

%d bloggers like this: