This is the Cole’s Notes’ version of The Undad and me.

Trent Wilkie and I met in fall 2011.  Trent had been contracted to write a story for Theatre Alberta’s All Stages Magazine about theatres, outside of the Calgary/Edmonton bubble, that were doing interesting things.  On twitter Trent asked for recommendations, and I sent him a message from the @shelltheatre  twitter account telling him he should speak with @riz_b (me).  Trent phoned, asked for 5 minutes of my time and took an additional 40.  The first paragraph of Trent’s published story included:

When talking to her I felt like I knew her from somewhere. Like someone I may have went to school with, if the school was on the moon. “I do all our introductions before our shows and if you are over the age of 75, you will think I’m hilarious,” jokes Budd.

After chatting on the phone, Trent and I continued to connect over social media for the next several months.  On December 30, 2011 we decided to meet face-to-face. We soon discovered that for almost ten years prior our paths had repeatedly crossed, although we had never met.

On October 15, 2012 Trent proposed.  Trent/Brent/Grant was still a very new addition to my life, but my family was excited  (and surprised) for us.

We were married on March 23, 2013.  Our social media friends came along for the ride.  @SaySandra even Storified the amazing community that celebrated with us: part one and part two!  Before the year was even through we found ourselves expecting our first child.

Valdy arrived on July 29, 2014.  Trent battled through 8 months of morning sickness, and 37 weeks of fear.

Trent and I are still getting a handle on this marriage thing and we haven’t yet found a rhythm for parenting.

I’m a manager.  I like routine and order.  I’m driven.  I measure success by an expansive yard stick filled to the brim with notches and goal posts I’ve methodically laid out.

Trent is an artist.  He is creative and spontaneous.  He moves forward in fits and bursts of frantic energy.  He wants it all, now.  He thrives on chaos. He rebels against routine.

I’m constantly coming up with ways for us to live better. Cope better. Fit better.

His smartphone is a revolving door of apps to help us plan for this or save for that.  My Amazon order history is all about finding space and time.

We’re figuring this out together and Mrs Undad is about the stuff and activities that fills the space between the start and finish line.