Winner of – Best Family Blog – from VUE Weekly 2017

12 Titles for possible books I’d write about my child

wizard

1 – Better off naked

2 – Cold air and a warm stream: Perfecting the mid diaper-change pee

3 – The baby who farts like a 50-year-old alcoholic vegetarian with two butt holes (#1 of the Bad Wind trilogy)1

4 – The history of screams

5 – You’ll never have sex again, Mom and Dad

6 – Burps, barfs and boobs in the land of the happy baby

7 – My best friend licked my butt (Dog food terror)

8 – Abandon all hope, ye who enter here, for all are welcome in the Palace of Farts (Bad Wind trilogy #2)

9 – I am the Christopher Columbus of discovering my penis

10 – IT TOOK ME 10 DAYS TO CREATE THE PERFECT GIFT FOR YOU. IT CAN BE FOUND IN MY DIAPER

11 – Knock knock. Who’s there? I’m pooping.

12 – I am the voice of God. The fog of war. The reaper of souls. Smell my opulent vengeance. (Final chapter in the Bad Wind trilogy)

Editor’s Notes

1 Alternative suggested title: The baby who farts like a 50-year-old alcoholic, with two butt holes, that had 7-layer dip for dinner and cold KFC for breakfast.

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