While reading The Undad, you may come across certain words or phrases that may not make sense (some of them on purpose). Here is a handy guide to refer to when faced with such things (this will be updated regularly):
Valdy, short for Voldemort (He who should not be named): Our son. Also known as the hoser, kid, glommer, the lamprey, slick and the boy. We are trying to keep his name offline because his online identity is his to create. I have no idea what the future of the Internet is going to be like, but it is up to the hoser to add his personality to it, whenever that is.
Glom: Whenever the little hoser sucker-fishes onto anything that has passed by his face hole. He gloms most things.
Anything said in old English: I’m probably describing poop.
Boobers, Boobsteak, Mr. EQ Boobers Sr.: The dog (and current holder of most AMA cards in the family).
Neumann, The Professor, my stepson: The other dog.
n00b: Me probably referring to myself when I do something stupid.
Elizabeth: My wife, partner, editor, swami and mother to our earth child offspring.
Boobnado: Whenever the little hoser doesn’t want a bottle and flails crazily until he gets milk from the tap.